At many given times along this path of change, one would be feeling scared, confused, angry, sad, and lonely in thinking about the incessant rate of broken home – divorce.

The thought might left one to be feelinged-out, numb. And all those plucky words of chin-up encouragement, or flat-lining platitudes friends and family continue to proffer are falling on deaf and numb and pained ears.

Other times, reaction to another person’s words can take one by surprise. One might find oneself struck by a truth feels so deeply, so innately, that one could never express it in words.

My words could be your own—they so closely resemble what you think and feel. I would give you a voice when you can’t trust yourselves. Whenever I think of broken homes, they make me feel seen and less alone but highly feelinged-out.

“You can have anything you want if you want it badly enough. You can be anything you want to be, do anything you set out to accomplish if you hold to that desire with singleness of purpose.”
—Abraham Lincoln

The purpose of getting into loveship by many people today had been long decayed; it could be even traced to the first day of conceiving the thought. What was in the mind when you ingnited the flame of love?

If you think that sexual infidelity is the leading cause of divorce, you’ve got it all wrong. In my quest to investigate on the why most today’s love affairs fall apart, married couples decide to split, and — believe it or not — communication problems came out on top as the number one reason relationships and marriages fail.

Marrying for money — we’ve all heard that that is a ticket to a quick divorce, but it is saddened that most people marry because it’s what they think they should do.

Many divorcee do say the problems that made them leave were there right from the beginning but “everyone expected us to live happily ever after” or “we had already spent so much money on the wedding” or “we had just built our dream home.” Must you forget that until you say “I do,” you always have the choice to say “I don’t!”

A codependent relationship is not healthy. Some partners don’t have their own interests or the opportunity to express themselves outside of coupledom, they become “couple dumb.”

Just as many couples/ lovers “forget” their single friends and single ways when they get married, when they add children into the mix, most parents soon neglect or completely forget that they are a couple.

As children grow and need less attention, many husbands and wives find that they have grown apart and they can’t remember why they ever got married in the first place because they no longer have anything in common.

Our today’s love affairs lack shared vision; everything changed when got married!” One drives the other crazy because one is a saver and the other is a spender. The idea of a weekend getaway is a cozy cottage in the woods; a partner wants to hit the town and catch a game. He thinks it’s your job to cook and clean, but you disagree.

Uncorrelated interrogations would ensue like the police who really wants vehicle particular, why didn’t he mention these things before? Maybe you should have asked. Chances are that things hadn’t changed — our expectations did. Is it possible to survive major differences in philosophy? It is possible, but many do not.

In today’s love affairs, somewhere in a marriage or relationship there is a subtle change in the intimacy department. One person has an off day, there is a misunderstanding or someone doesn’t feel well. Then there’s the idea that he isn’t as romantic or she isn’t as sexual.

Whoever is the one with the subtle change can trigger a downward spiral in the intimacy department. Men generally need sexual receptivity to feel romantic and women generally need romance to be sexual receptive. As long as both people are getting what they need, they willingly provide what the other person wants. However, when there is a lessening on either’s part, that can trigger a pulling back in the other. If gone unnoticed and unchecked, before the couple realizes, they are seriously intimately estranged and wonder what happened. This can lead to divorce as couples begin to feel unloved and unappreciated.

Somewhere written into a human’s genetic code lie the instruction that when a person isn’t happy, he or she is supposed to force his/her significant to make the changes required to make the unhappy person happy again. This usually takes the form of complaining, blaming, criticizing, nagging, threatening, punishing and/or bribing.

It is not just hearsay, lack of compatibility in the Financial arena affects most loveship compare to the general belief that a usually lack of finances cause divorce.

Little or no knowledge about the importance of physical contact. Of course, sex is great, but one also needs to supplement it with little hello and goodbye kisses, impromptu hugs and simply holding hands. Couples who don’t maintain an intimate connection through both sexual and non-sexual actions are destined to become virtual strangers.

“Don’t spend time beating on a wall, hoping it will transform into a door.” — Coco Chanel

In conclusion,

Our today’s partners are suffering from a deadly disease, in fact, it is scary than the Coronavirus ravaging the whole world; it is the inability to resolve conflicts.

Every couple has disagreements. The key is to develop ground rules so that each partner feels respected and heard. Sometimes it takes a third party “referee” to help define those rules and teach us to move through the charged emotions so resentments don’t linger.

When one or both people in the marriage are attempting to coerce each other into doing things they don’t want to do for their partner’s happiness, it is a recipe for disaster. When you are unhappy in a relationship, it’s okay to ask for the change you want. But, if your partner doesn’t oblige you, then you become responsible for your own happiness.